My Cheeky Response to Every Bike Lane Rant I’ve Ever Read

Little rally against bike lanes in KitsI’m a motorist. I have a driver’s license and I occasionally drive a motor vehicle.

Obviously I have nothing against people driving cars in Vancouver. I fully support car roads. I’m just against cars using the roads that I want to ride my bike on. There’s a major arterial 5 blocks away. Why can’t cars stay on that street?

The few motorists I see using my local street are always breaking the law. They speed, they roll through stop signs, and they talk on their cellphone. Until they learn to follow the rules, we shouldn’t be building any more roads.

I’m worried that adding more cars to my local street will decrease the price of my million dollar home. Who will want to live here when the street is clogged with noisy, smelly vehicles? Worse, when traffic shifts from neighbouring streets to my street, it will probably increase the price of someone else’s million dollar home. It’s not fair.

City Council is putting in streets, roads, and alleys without proper consultation. I went to 5 meetings where I yelled at the traffic engineers. They obviously didn’t listen. The process is flawed, which is why I suggest we delay any action until we come up with a plan that is unanimously supported. If it takes forever, great. I lied when I said I supported roads for motorists anyway.

Photo by Brent Granby.


  1. I will gladly take arterial roads if they are not congested, unfortunately the plan to shut down PG rd will create more congestion on 4th, especially at 4th and MacDonald.

    Any plan to shut down a road with a lot of traffic has to include improving the neighbouring arterial roads to handle the increase. This plan does not address that, or even considers it.


    • First – we’ve heard doom-and-gloom predictions of debilitating congestion before – with Burrard Bridge, Dunsmuir, and Hornby. Spoiler Alert: it never materialized. Maybe Kits will be special, then you can resurrect the short-lived website that Mike Klassen started when the Burrard Bridge bike lane was installed.

      Second – I’ve heard a few Kits residents now complain about congestion slowing down their commute. You do realize that if you’re driving that you’re part of the problem? Everyone wants to live close to downtown and have no traffic on their drive in. I’m sorry, but that’s a fantasy that just doesn’t exist. Any chance you’d support measures aimed at reducing congestion? Better public transit, congestion charges, traffic calming, public bike share?


  2. Don’t forget about the streets that see only one or two cars a day. I mean what I waste of money to have such roads 😉

    Sadly I think when (certain) people read this, it will go right over their head and not understand what it was actually meant to show, but good job!
    I use to be furious at these sort of rants from people (the ones against bike lanes), now I find them rather hilarious as it shows how hysterical and “2012” (world ending) they are.


    • We’re lucky in Vancouver to have a city council that ignored the ridiculous rants of the anti-bike crowd and recently approved more bike lanes. Although I wish every km wasn’t such a fight.


      • Yeah, it shouldn’t have to be a fight for every little speck of space. It should just be a normal part of every street.
        One day I think it will be. What other choice do we have?


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